18 Summers

I saw a TikTok earlier today. Big surprise, right? Except this one was for Father’s Day. But it was different. It started off showing a conversation between a kid and his dad. Kid, who’s now older, is asking what their dad wants. The dad responded, “When you were little you had a red bike. Do you remember it?” Kid responded that they did and that their dad wanted a bike for Father’s Day? “No child. I used to sit and watch you ride up and down the driveway on that bike. I don’t want a bike or anything. I want memories.”

There is nothing better than spending time with my kids. Not work, not hitting the lottery, nothing. As parents we have 18 summers if we are lucky with our kids. After that, it’s college, friends, work. It changes.

Now add in when the parents aren’t together, that number drops significantly. Thankfully, we get along great, and the kids come and go as they please, and if they’re at the other’s house, and they want us, that’s cool too. If we didn’t… I don’t want to think about that.

This year is bittersweet. As will every year from here on out. Enjoying it as a father, and a son to my father. But painfully celebrating as my brother is no longer here. Dad only has one of us. And I fucking hate it. Matt’s kids can’t celebrate with him. Shane’s son can’t.

These past 2 years have taught me a lot. Both personal and professional. One thing that has become an even harder line — work-life balance. I work so I can afford what I do; I don’t live to work. The kids call, or they need a ride, or they want to hang out — if it’s a slow day, I’m there. Busy day, first chance I get, I’m there.

Lying on their deathbed, no one says they wished they worked that Saturday, or put in that overtime. This Father’s Day, focus on what matters. Being present, being with them, being there for them when they need you. Being not only a father, eventually friend, but also a Dad.

Happy Father’s Day!