I’m Fine

“I’m fine.”

“Eh, I’m alright.”

“I’m here.”

Honestly, 90% of the time, we are.

But, just like in business, that last 10%... well, that’s where the meat and potatoes are. Where the real work begins; the shit no one sees.

Take it at face value if you will, but I can guarantee you, if we are comfortable enough with you, and you follow up with “really?” or “not just surface level,” that answer changes.

We as men are conditioned from a young age to be powerful, strong, confident.

When in reality, there are times when we are weak, unsure, scared, pissed off, exhausted, or completely lost.

And even now, in a world that loves to talk about men opening up, nobody really knows what to do when it doesn’t come out clean.

Everyone says men should talk. They just don’t always want the version that shakes, snaps, shuts down, or comes out ugly.

And it’s fucking bullshit.

Fortunately, we have found outlets; maybe not always the most healthy... but we have found them. The garage, the truck, work, dark humor, staying busy, not talking, talking shit instead of talking about what’s actually wrong.

Other times, it may cause a crack to form, and during that time it may come out as a gross overreaction. An argument over something minuscule. A tone that didn’t match the conversation. Getting pissed over something stupid. Shutting down completely.

It isn’t always intentional.

That’s a crack.

At any given point my “I’m fine” is the same as a duck casually swimming. Calm and collected on the surface, underwater, paddling like hell.

Anything from bills, hours at work, client calls, car issues, trying to grow the business, kid issues, grief, everything and anything.

But, I go through each day grateful to be here. Grateful for my kids, their health, and the chance to keep going.

And I don’t want to bring anyone down if I’m not doing ok, so I say I’m fine.

Focusing on the positives.

And most of the time, I am.

Just not all the way.

Stay Here. Keep Going.